 | Diary Navigation:
|
September 16, 2003
September 16, 2003
Nathan 17 months old
Austin Scheduled C Section Dec 17, 2003
26 weeks pregnant
I am embarrassed to say it but before our busy and fun day this past Saturday, I hadn’t left the house in a whole week. I am so lazy and unmotivated with this pregnancy, it is crazy! I was a bit of a grouch during the week too; I guess it was cabin fever. My poor hubby :) Unless there is something really fun or important to do, Nathan and I don’t leave the house during the day and once Kevin comes home from work, it’s suppertime, clean up, bath, and showers so we normally don’t really go anywhere in the evening also. Daddy takes Nathan for walks all the time though to make sure he at least gets out of the house, poor little guy! It’s so ironic though, most of Nathan’s first year of life we only had one vehicle so we had no choice but to stay home, now that we have two vehicles, we don’t go anywhere because of pregnant mommy! Literally about the time we were able to buy another vehicle is when my pregnancy symptoms came on full force. Once they came I didn’t want to leave the house. It figures huh?
Party Time
Normally, our weekends consist of going out of town to see family or we have nothing at all to do. In life you can pretty much count on once you have something planned for a day, ten other things will come up for that same day and time. That was the case for us this past Saturday. A few weeks ago, I got an email from my ex co-worker/friend inviting us to a party they were having for their department. I was so excited to go because I have really missed all my co-workers from my internship. I was also excited for them to see Nathan because it had been months since they had seen him and they haven’t seen me since Austin has been with us :) The only problem was for weeks now Kevin and I have been anticipating taking Nathan to meet Elmo, Cookie Monster, Arthur, and other children’s characters at Forest Park in St Louis. Of course both activities were on Saturday and started at the same time. So we had to decide whether to skip one of them or make them both work for us. We decided to go to the party for awhile and then make it to see Elmo before that ended. The party was a lot of fun. A lot of delicious food and very tempting drinks that mommy couldn’t drink! It was so nice to see all of my fellow case managers and it was nice to ask about some of my favorite clients. Nathan was a big handful there! I was drenched in sweat! It didn’t help that the house it was being held at, was huge with many floors and Nathan couldn’t decide which floor or room he wanted to be in. Basically, Kevin and I took turns eating and chatting with people. To say this house is beautiful is an understatement; it surpasses even my DREAM HOUSE! I couldn’t believe it! It isn’t my co-workers salary of a case manager that got them that house, let me tell ya! I was definitely envious while taking the tour but I know I couldn’t have her lifestyle. Her hubby has a great job but he literally travels 5-6 days a week, every week, all the time! The only time she sees him are the weekends, so he doesn’t even get to enjoy their great house. So I guess I shouldn’t be jealous of the house unless I would be willing to take all that goes with it ya know? They are in their 50’s and done with child raising so maybe it’s doable. I would just miss my hubby. She always kids around that him being gone all the time is probably what makes their marriage work. She seems to like her “alone time.” To each is own I guess. Every time I see my old coworkers I always wonder if I am making the right choice in staying home. It was the best place to work and I truly loved what I did and who I worked with. Once graduation came and my internship ended there, they were actually hoping I would want to work there full time but I had just had Nathan and knew I wanted to be home at least his first year if not until he is in preschool. As we were leaving to see Elmo, my old supervisor asked me if eventually I would be looking for work and of course I said yes because I don’t want to stay home forever and she began to say how much they miss me and love me and how great I was with the clients and how she always keeps me in her mind. It would be so great if there was a job opening there once I am looking for work. I have to admit it was nice hearing how much they miss me and love me :):) Although, hearing those sentiments sometimes makes me wonder if home is where I belong. I know sweet Nathan would say all those great things and more if he could! So for now, I am staying right where I am!
Meeting Elmo
We were at the party from noon until about 3:00 and decided to leave and try and meet Elmo. We only had till 5 to see him so we knew we didn’t have a lot of time for Nathan to try and sneak a nap in. We were hoping he would nap in the car on the way there, but we knew he probably wouldn’t knowing his past history :) Well, we were right, Nathan didn’t nap the entire drive to St Louis. Since he was so tired we had no clue how he would respond to seeing Elmo and Cookie Monster. We were hoping he would still be excited to see them. Well, we had just enough time to see both Elmo and Cookie Monster before the festival ended. He smiled and enjoyed seeing Cookie Monster. Poor little Nathan wanted to be on his lap forever, not just a few seconds. Then came the moment Kevin and I have been anticipating for weeks on end – Nathan meeting Elmo – his all time favorite person! Unfortunately, it didn’t go as well as we had hoped and dreamed about. Nathan saw Elmo while we were in line and he had no patience at all while we were waiting for our turn to sit on Elmo’s lap. Nathan was sooooo mad and began screaming bloody murder and crying. He didn’t understand that we had to wait. Nathan was the only toddler in line screaming. That seems to be a central theme lately. Just last weekend, Nathan was the only toddler screaming on the Zoo train when it made frequent stops. Poor Nathan had got himself so worked up that once he was on Elmo’s lap he couldn’t really enjoy it. His face was all red and he had a snotty nose. Nathan was just calming down and enjoying the fact he was on Elmo’s lap when it was time for the next person. UGH! I don’t think we even got any good pictures of him with Elmo. That was the one thing we were hoping for. He definitely loved being on Elmo’s lap, I wish he could have been on there longer. It was sweet to see him so happy! I teased Kevin that he should dress up as a 6’4” Elmo for Halloween :):) Needless to say after the party and meeting Elmo Nathan finally took a nap on the drive home.
Time To Myself
Both Working and Stay at Home Moms just don’t get enough time alone to unwind! I often forget I am more than a mom and I actually have a lot of interests and loves outside of diapers and Toys R Us. As a Stay at Home Mom, I am literally with Nathan 24 7. I go months at a time before I leave the house without a toddler in hand. I am very fortunate that I have the greatest husband in the world and he actually encourages me to leave the house but stupid stupid me, I never do it! Well, on Sunday I decided to take the plunge and I left the house without a diaper bag, a fussy toddler, cheerios, and toys. I actually carried a purse, Oh My Goodness, someone better call Guinness! I spent 4-5 glorious hours by myself on Sunday. I went to the local city library for the first time ever!! In fact it was the first time I had stepped foot inside a library, since I graduated from college. I must say it was sooooo nice to be in the library with no papers to research or no exams to study for. I could do whatever I wanted and for as long as I wanted. WOW! I browsed the books for awhile. I looked through all my favorite types of books. Some of which include: self help, books about moms, current news, culture (specifically about African American culture), and spirituality. After I got a good heavy dose of intellectual stimuli, I paged through endless mindless Hollywood magazines like “US”, “People” – you get my drift. I have to say going to the library was so wonderful, peaceful, and I enjoyed using the non mom part of my brain. Of course while I was there, I did read a few "Parenting" magazines. Going there also brought back many memories from my past. In junior high and college I worked in the school library and I spent endless hours as a teenager at the local library. Sometimes I would go there to do homework or study and other times I would just go there for some peace and quiet from home. Needless to say, my younger brother and I had some tough moments as teenagers. I am sure a lot of you can relate to that :) It was always a refuge for me. So I guess it makes sense that I went there on Sunday. Plus, since we don’t have much money, quite a bit of things were ruled out like shopping etc….. On the way home I did stop by Wal-Mart to pick up some things we needed at home and decided to splurge and I got two cd singles. I got Clay Aiken’s and Ruben Studdard’s singles from American Idol season 2. My hubby and I were huge American Idol fans and we both favored Ruben with Clay a very close second. Recently, my mom, Kevin, and I went to an American Idol concert in St Louis and I somehow left being the hugest Clay fan. I still love Ruben but Clay was incredible in person. He was actually the crowd’s favorite also! I actually wish the whole concert would have been only Clay. I can’t wait for his first actual cd to come out. The whole drive home I listened to my new cd singles. I have to say listening to Clay sing “Bridge Over Troubled Water” all the way home was a perfect way to end my alone time. Getting out of the house by myself did me a lot of good! I know I really need to commit to doing that at least once a week but it doesn’t seem very realistic. There are always more mom things to be doing ya know? I am very lucky that my hubby actually encourages it and it makes him happy to see me enjoy myself :) I will definitely remember my afternoon alone for quite some time :)
Ultrasound of Austin
Here I am 26 weeks pregnant and I haven’t really talked about being pregnant or about my sweet little Austin that much in my entries so far. I guess because I just recently got this diary I feel like I have so much writing to catch up with, let alone all the daily occurrences I could write about. I find it so hard to believe that I am 26 weeks along already. I am almost to my last trimester, YEAH!!!! It has gone so quick, much quicker than when I was pregnant with Nathan, probably because now I am busy taking care of a busy toddler while being pregnant. It seems like I am much more tired and unmotivated during this pregnancy, again probably because I am busy taking care of a toddler :) I have a lot of the same symptoms as my first pregnancy. My lower back hurts quite a bit, I have the worst gag reflux, and I smell everything in sight – good and bad! Sometimes, I have to remind myself that it’s not Nathan that is inside of me. I know that must sound crazy but I find it so hard to believe I have a whole new baby growing inside of me. It seems like just yesterday that Nathan was in there. I can’t wait to see what Austin looks like. I wonder if he will look like me, daddy, or like Nathan. Nathan couldn’t be a more perfect combination of me and Kevin. Some people say he looks just like me and others say he is a carbon copy of Kevin. He really is a 50/50 version of me and Kevin. I love how every time I look at him, I see myself and Kevin. It makes my heart melt! All I truly want for Christmas is a safe, healthy, full term baby. I can’t believe in 3 months how much our lives are going to change again. I can’t wait! Although, I know how much more work it will be. We are excited about twice the love! At my last OB appt I got a little surprise from my doctor. He asked when my next ultrasound was scheduled for. I told him I didn’t realize I got another one since I had already had my 20 wk one. He said that they didn’t get the best view of Austin’s heart the last time and want to do it again. Of course I freaked out! We saw the four chambers and the ultrasound technician didn’t act like she didn’t get what she needed. The doctor told me not to worry and they just want to try again. My ultrasound is on Thursday morning and I am so nervous. I keep thinking something is wrong and they just aren’t telling me yet till they know for sure. I know for a fact I won’t sleep the night before. For my 20 wk ultrasound when we were hoping to find out the gender, I was up by 2 am. I just couldn’t sleep; I was so nervous and anxious. I am sure this will be a repeat of that. I just hope and pray Austin is safe and healthy and it turns out to just be another chance to look at our little miracle! It is so amazing how much he is moving now! I will update you all once we have our ultrasound on Thursday. Wish me luck :)
I can’t believe how long this ended up being. Thank you so much for reading, if you are still with me here :)
Talk To Me Please – It has been pretty lonely on my TTM board. Would love to hear from you! Wouldn’t it be so cool if there was a counter on the diary entries? I always wonder if anyone out there reads my diary.
I feel so fortunate to be a part of this community! In just the short time I have kept a diary, I truly feel like I have made some great pals – both fellow diarywriters and readers! If you are reading this, hopefully you know who you are :):):) I hope this is the start of a lifelong friendship :):)
Have a great week everyone! Thinking of those trying to conceive!
God Bless~
Kelly, Nathan, and Austin
http://web.infoave.net/~kelkev12/
P.S. How could I forget? Thank you SOOOO much to those who prayed for my grandma! It means so much! She is still hanging in there. The doctor is trying a new inhaler for her and a new medication. She called me the other day after reading my entry about her and told me there was no way she was going to go before she got a chance to see sweet little Austin in December. I love her so much!
 |  |
|
want to keep a diary on iParenting?
Authoring a diary on the iParenting network allows you to chronicle your family's story, preserving it for years to come. It's also a great way to get the most out of the iParenting community. Click here to start...
|
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families. 
