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December 28, 2004
Well ho ho ho to us… Poor Ava came down with a rager of an ear infection on Christmas day. She’d had a terrible head cold for a day or two, but woke up Christmas morning pulling at her ears saying ‘rowie’ (her word for owie). I thought we might be able to hold her off until the walk in clinic opened at 9am on the 26th. We loaded her up with Motrin and Tylenol both and tried to enjoy the day. By 6:00pm she’d spiked a big fever even with all the medicine on board so we took her to the emergency room. Merry Christmas. Ear infection in both ears – a bad one – her second this month. We have a follow up with her pediatrician next week where I expect we will begin to discuss tubes in earnest.
Christmas Eve we had a very nice time at dinner with my family. John made his ‘famous’ Seven Onion Soup (Quick – name them all - Red, Yellow, White, Green, Leeks, Shallots and Garlic – yes garlic is an onion) and my mom made a nice baked ziti. We crammed ourselves into the hot, sweaty, perfumed sanctuary for Christmas services and then went back to our house for dessert – crème brule and Bailey’s. Christmas morning we got up and began the two person, full time job of tending to a sick Ava. Meghan and Lane came over at 10am to open gifts and celebrate. They were thrilled with their gifts, which was fun. It was cool to see Ava figure out there was stuff she wanted under the wrapping paper. She rallied with a dose of new toys and pain medicine for a couple of hours, and then refused to take a nap. So we got the double whammy of sick and tired baby. It was at this point that I realized that I rely on nap time as much as she does. What are we going to do when she decides she doesn’t need a nap anymore?
John had long-made plans with Meghan and Lane to go to a movie on Christmas day. I think it is important for him to spend time with them, just them, to honor the fact that they have to split their holiday and that can be stressful. But I’ll write here that I was one bitter chick to watch him drive away with the kids and leave me with a sick baby. I took Ava over to my folks house, hoping some more adults would help out. I was seething, I’ll admit it. Later that evening, after John got back from the movie, we left my extended, extended family gathering to drive to the hospital. It was the right decision, no doubt, but a hard one to arrive at. I am somehow conditioned that the ER is just not the place to go unless its life threatening. I don’t know why. But the emergency room was our only option on December 25th. Once we were there a kid posing as a doctor saw us relatively quickly. I would have carded him for beer, no joke. He was very thorough, but I’ll bet his student ID hasn’t expired yet. It made me feel like an old jaded parent because all I was thinking is ‘just give us the script for the antibiotics so we can go home and try to salvage what’s left of this day.’ I opened the gifts from my mom, grandma etc… much later that night. Sunday I felt like I was moving through concrete to take care of my girl, who by then was feeling quite a bit better, but I was worn all the way out.
To top it all off, the much desired X Box for Lane only works on our TV in our living room. He has a TV in his room, but it is pretty old – it was a gift to me my freshman year of college (gulp) over 13 years ago. I know I sound like the worst kind of wicked stepmother, but I absolutely hate video games. If it were up to me they wouldn’t be in my house. They’re loud, there’s something sort of passively addictive about them – I really dislike watching Lane play – he gets that kind of vacant look on his face and can literally sit for hours. Well, I got to see that first hand with the added bonus of some kind of game that puts the player in the perspective of shooting a gun. Ugh! The system came with two games I’m ok with – some football and tennis, but he bought the gun one with Christmas gift certificates from his Uncle bright and early on the morning of the 26th. I absolutely didn’t want Ava in the room with a big gun shooting creatures, so it kind of limits where we can both be when Lane’s playing the video game. John and I are due for a talk about how we’re going to address this particular issue. I’m not terribly interested in the resolution to this particular problem being buying a new TV, but frankly I’m willing to consider it.
I am reading this over and it sounds like I’m only griping, which I guess I am. There were a number of bright spots to the holiday weekend. John surprised me with an iPod mini of my own, which I am thrilled about. For some reason listening to music through ear phones is so much more intimate than just listening at home or while driving. It was awesome to see my sister, who I really miss. I got to sit next to Grandma Jane at Christmas Eve services. People got Ava such nice gifts – books, good toys, and a baby in a basket a Magna Doodle that she adores…. It was very good to be with my family. By Monday morning I’m somewhat embarrassed to admit that I was ready to be back at work, if nothing else for the break from the merriment and family. Of course by 11am I was aching to see my girl and hug my husband. I’m a freak.
Wednesday morning we’re heading out to Minnesota to spend a few days with John’s family. A nice bright spot to that trip should be seeing a good friend of mine from college. She had a son about five months after Ava was born, but the two of them have never met. We decided to take a visit to the Minnesota Children’s Museum rather than attempt lunch with two active toddlers. We thought this way we might actually get to talk a little bit. I’ll certainly be bringing the camera to capture our kiddos. This friend of mine was a sorority sister – it is incomprehensible in a way that the friend I drank beer with at fraternity parties over ten years ago would be meeting me at a children’s museum with our two toddlers. When did I get so old?
Something about coming to the end of the year makes me feel compelled to take stock of things and think about my wishes for 2005.
2004 was quite a year for our family…
John finished law school. He took the bar, he passed the bar. He started a new job.
Ava had her first birthday, learned to walk, learned to talk – turned from a baby into a toddler before our very eyes.
John lost his Grandma Ada.
I learned to row.
I ‘survived’ a skin cancer scare (in a place the sun don’t shine) and surgery.
We took our first family vacation in nearly four years.
Meghan started her senior year of high school.
Meghan fell in love for the first time.
Lane turned 16 and learned to drive.
Lane learned to surf.
We lost Koko our beloved family dog.
My wishes for 2005 range from the typical to the mundane.
I have found in the past year that I am healthier when we prepare meals at home. We’ve reduced the numbers of meals we eat out considerably and I’d like to continue that downward trend. Not because I don’t enjoy a good meal in a nice restaurant. I’m talking more about the ‘hurry up and grab something’ that never results in eating fresh, healthy, whole foods. This time of year it is so stinking hard to eat good produce – what’s in the stores looks so anemic or is ridiculously expensive. But I hope to continue to work to eat healthy whole foods prepared at home as much as possible.
And another food note – I feel 100% better if I eat a good breakfast. And by good, I don’t mean big, I just mean something nutritious that stays with me. Peanut butter on an English muffin, a piece of fruit, some yogurt and granola… I need to take the five minutes every morning to insure I have something for breakfast. It starts my day off so much better than skipping breakfast and being ravenous by 10:00am – at which point I make some really bad decisions like buying Cheetos from the vending machines.
I was at a holiday party before Christmas and was standing in a small group of people – maybe 6 or 7. One of the people in the group had recently suffered a pretty significant professional loss, another a very significant personal loss and this was just the two I knew about. It got me to thinking that I need to look for ways to be kinder to people. Everyone is carrying around their own grief, their own loss, their own pain. It doesn’t mean they can’t function, be happy, move on, but I know during the times I’ve suffered through those feelings I was so grateful for the people who met me head on, treated me kindly and gave space to the pain. Even when they didn’t necessarily know what was going on with me. I want to be more like that for people.
I’ve been fussing and stewing over the state of my professional future for the better part of a year. In the coming year I want to be more proactive in searching out opportunities and putting myself forward.
It is time for John and I to get serious about getting our financial house in order. We’ve been doing some good work on our budget, but with some luck and some planning this will be the year we can begin to knock out some of our debt accumulated during law school.
I want to stop nibbling on my finger nails.
I want to be one of those women who always has pretty lipstick on. Why is that so hard?
Inspired by Brooke – the Urbran Earth Mama’s entry from this summer – I’m going to list some of my favorite things. I did a shortened version of this on a Babies Today entry, taken from one of those ‘survey your friends’ emails that circulate from time to time, but I wanted to be more expansive. Share yours!
Favorite outfit: My current most favorite outfit is my Seven for All Mankind jeans with a pink A stitched on the pocket. I wear them with a pale pink cardigan from Banana that has a matching sexy little lace camisole that peaks out from underneath.
Some favorite products:
Shampoo/conditioner – I am currently using Kerastase shampoo and conditioner. It is ridiculously expensive, but really does nice things to my hair. I’m thinking of trying out Keihl’s brand since I love all their other stuff so much.
Lotion – I am not a big perfume person, but I love Keihl’s cucumber lotion. It is earthy and nice without being over powering. I use it daily, but I am out right now. Trying to hold out until we get to MN to get some more! Using Nivea extra enriched until then. It’s close, but no cigar.
Hand lotion – Aveda hand relief. Bar none.
Lips – Tie between Rosebud lip salve and Lancôme Juicy Tubes in nearly any color.
Favorite accessory – I feel like I should talk about my engagement and wedding rings, which I love, but what I am currently really enjoying is the Tiffany toggle bracelet John got for me after Ava was born. Her name is engraved on the back of the ‘Return to Tiffany’ disc. It is a chunky, funky reminder of my girl.
Favorite accessory part 2 – A Burberry knock off bucket hat. Can hide the worst of hair days. Ditto for a cheapie cowboy hat from J Crew.
Most favorite random find – My mother bought me a fur coat at a consignment shop. I know it is just terribly un-PC, but I love it. It’s warm, its kind of retro, sort of funky. She spent $20 on it and I love it!
Best Movie I saw this year: “In America” by a mile. I’ve recommended it to everyone I can think of. Beautiful film. Runner up would be “Before Sunset” the ‘sequel’ to “Before Sunrise.” I loved seeing how the characters aged and it was so romantic.
Best Book I read this year: I can’t remember exactly when I read it – I think it was this year, but it might have been last – “The Time Traveler’s Wife.” I am not typically a big fan of science fiction/fantasy but I have thought about Henry and Clare so often since I read that book. I think I’ve bought 4 or 5 copies of it and given them out to all the readers in my life. I don’t do that very often.
Here’s wishing you joy in 2005. Thanks for reading--
--Kate
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