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November 19, 2002
Hana was baptized on Sunday at St. Mark’s Catholic Church.
I am Roman Catholic, and Mike is, shall we say, non-affiliated. He believes in a higher power, but not in any particular faith or religious ideology (this is how he was raised, I might add). I appreciate, honor and respect his beliefs, and he does the same for me. I am often in awe of this man I married; in his goodness, his authenticity and his loyalty. No church or religion can change that.
Religion is a personal matter and I respect and honor that, not just with Mike, but with my family and friends. Because religion is so personal, it can also be controversial. I want to just preface this entry by saying that I am open to, and do my best to be accepting of, all different beliefs and philosophies (as long as they are borne of goodness). I feel a bit vulnerable discussing my own beliefs in this forum, but this is important to me and is vital to my new role as a mother. So I shall discuss, and I hope you will join in…but if you do post, I beg you to be respectful and kind. So here goes…
The maternal side of my family is Catholic to the core. My maternal grandparents both hailed from big Irish Catholic families. I grew up going to church every Sunday and CCD (kind of a “Sunday school”-but not on Sunday-for Catholic kids not in Catholic school) each week. My dad was raised Christian but does not practice organized religion. He reads the Bible, he believes in God, but he is not Catholic, and he doesn’t go to church.
I struggled with, and turned away, from my faith as a teenager and young adult, but have come back to it. Mike & I were married in the Catholic Church, and so we had to attend a series of pre-marital sessions with a group of other engaged couples, hosted by a married couple in our Parish. The sessions were enlightening for me. I realized that I missed my church and missed my religion. In the first session we were asked to talk about our religious backgrounds and what the Church means to us. I took myself (and Mike) completely by surprise when I found myself in tears as I answered those questions. They weren’t tears of sadness; I was just overwhelmed by the unexpected depth of emotion I felt for the Church and for my faith. I realized in that moment just how much I missed the kinship & community of the Church, and the bond to the morals and values espoused by the Church (I am intentionally refraining from sarcastically remarking on the practices of some of its clergy). I do not agree with many issues the Church has taken a stand on, and perhaps I could be accused of being hypocritical for overlooking those things. But for me, my faith is not in the details, but instead in the greater influence.
I will raise Hana in the Catholic Church. This Church and this faith will always be a part of her, an irrevocable piece person she becomes. I expect her to one day question my decision and question her connection to God. I hope that she does, and I hope that she finds a set of values and a method of practicing them that works for her. I do hope that someday my daughter and grandchildren will join me on Sunday mornings in Mass, but I will respect Hana’s decision if they do not.
So…
Hana was baptized on Sunday; her formal induction into Roman Catholicism, by way of a very old and very traditional ceremony. Hana wore the baptismal gown worn by grandfather, my mother, and me. She was, no pun intended, an angel during the ceremony (she had both hands shoved into her mouth, and I was thankful because that kept her busy and quiet). After the ceremony we had a lovely family luncheon (for 15-ack!) at my (small) house. We toasted Hana, and she received many generous and thoughtful gifts, including a $100 savings bond, several beautiful (religious) children’s books, her first Christmas ornaments, and a beautiful sterling silver charm bracelet from my parents. The charm bracelet has a tiny sterling silver cup engraved with her birthdate, and a tiny sterling silver Bible engraved with her Baptism date on the front, and the Lord’s Prayer on the back. We will buy Hana a new charm for each birthday and for significant events in her life. I was so touched by this keepsake that will forever commemorate the day of her Baptism.
We received this prayer, and I find it to be touching, inspiring and true, no matter what your beliefs.
A Prayer for Parents
Lord, give us the wisdom to discover our children’s needs,
Help us to know when they need courage, when they need comfort,
Let us discipline with prudence, give affection with strength
Let us free our children to test themselves against the world, confident in our support.
Let our children find strength in their heritage,
Let our home be their haven when life tumbles over.
Let us be their roots, their beginning,
And they, the sweet flowers of our love.
Let us love one another in peace, harmony and grave,
As you have loved us.
Lord, help us to be like children, radiant with the joy of life, trusting of others, and reliant on your love. Most of all, help us to delight in all that you give.
These hands that wipe tears, prepare meals, change diapers, tend to skinned knees and runny noses are tools of love. They hold and caress and can express caring and concern when words fail us. May these hands always be used in a gentle manner. May the Lord’s blessing be upon them and all that they do.
Amen.
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