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July 11, 2004
Emily 2 years, 3 motns
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/j/jensem/
I had my doctor's appointment this past week to further investigate what could be causing my early miscarriages. I kind of feel dumb talking about things like this. I was joking with Jeremy the other day and moaning about my uterus. It just seems such an odd body part to be worried about. I was really nervous that the moment the techinician put her wand on my tummy we would see these hugs cysts and tears all around my uterus. Then the sad, desperate side of me was dreaming that she would look at the screen, turn to me and say, "Did you know you're still pregnant?" Whaaaaaat???? Talk about not letting go, huh? Fortunately and unfortunately the technician said neither. She said I had a rather small, but perfectly healthy, uterus. YAY!!! So, NOW what is causing the miscarriages? My doctor decided to take more blood tests and look into any immune related problems, but she's doubting that is the case since we already have Emily and these are conditions that would affect you your whole life.
I've been doing a lot of praying over the whole situation. God must have been listening to me because I am finally at peace over a lot of this whole situation. I am a little scared about the results of the blood tests because of the "what if" factor, but the idea of Emily being our only child is not sounding as terrifying as it did a few months ago. I definitely have no control over this situation, which is probably the hardest for me to deal with.
Onto, my little Emily. Emily hasn't been having any tantrums or whining lately but she certainly has learned a new way to press mine and Jeremy's buttons. Emily has decided to kill us with kindness. When she is doing something she shouldn't be doing and we catch her she just laughs and giggles smiles in our direction. She gets so excited at the idea of defyingus that she actually shakes with glee. This is the most challenging situation I have come across. I get so mad, but at the same time her actions ARE very amusing. The biggest problem with this new attitude is Emily now gets really wound up and doesn't know how to calm down. Actually I'm certain she does know how to calm down but acting like a wound top is much more fun. She'll run around the apartment laughing and screaming and practically bouncing off of the walls. I sometimes encourage this behavior as it leads to wonderful naps.
Emily continues to add to her vocabulary. She has been making up more and more stories and can talk on the phone with anyone for a really long time. She is just like Jeremy when he's on the phone. He tends to pace instead of sitting down. Emily does the same thing walking up and down the hall while conversing. We have an appointment tomorrow with her orthopedic surgeon to find out if any more braces are necessary. I hope not. She grew out of her last pair a few months ago and I have gotten used to not using them. Unfortunately her right ankle still looks so weak that it seems painful to walk on them at the angle they lay. I'm hoping we can avoid braces and he'll suggest an insert for her shoe.
We finally bought a video camera last week and I've been having so much fun with it. We've already posted some online videos, but have been having problems with the free site we are using. I'm going to look around for a decent paid site and post all of Emily's videos there. We also purchased a DVD burner so we could make videos for family. I decided to start out by making a slideshow with the thousands of pictures that I've taken of Emily. That slideshow has become addictive for me. In fact, I'm going to cut this entry short so I can finish my latest slideshow and give it to my mom on her birthday.
Until Later....
Jennifer
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