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June 15, 2004
Emily 2 years, 2 months
Today was supposed to be a better day than yesterday but unfortunately that was not the case.
I will start out with positive moments from today. My biggest positive, Miss Emily Marie. I love my little girl. Today I had to drop by the office to leave some paperwork and pick more up. I took Emily with me.
A little background to my daughter's personality. When Emily was an infant she hated any environment other than our home. Going out and about with Emily could be torture. She was afraid of any place where there were people. Noises would send her into high decible screaming fits and there was no way to stop her screams once she started. Noises that would cause this reaction would include, sneezing, soda cans being opened, doors shutting, ice being put in a glass....pretty much anything that wasn't a consistent noise would affect Emily negatively. I remember calling my mom and asking her if this was "normal". Would I have to spend the rest of my life at home all day with my wee one?
I decided to face the issue head on and did a lot of grinning and bearing for the next year or so. Jeremy and I would pack Emily up to go to the grocery store and we would be really confident that this would be the outing where nothing bad would happen. We would load Emily up in her stroller and walk toward the entrance to the store when, all of a sudden, Jeremy would sneeze, Emily would arch her back and scream at the top of her lungs (she has good lungs by the way) and we would be making a quick U-turn back to the car while onlookers were convinced that we were beating our child.
Within the past 6 months Jeremy and I started to notice that Emily wasn't crying as much when we went out. As long as she had her sippy cup full of water (Emily doesn't like milk or juice) and a handful of goldfish crackers we were doing pretty good. Emily started to talk more and engage other people in conversation. She started to flirt with the lady at the checkstand. She would wave bye bye to the banker. A soda can would open and Emily would look at me, hold her ears and say, "Ouch Momma", but no tears. Change was happening.
Bring us to today.... Emily no longer has a problem with any noises. I still sometimes catch her turning her head quickly to certain noises, but she doesn't seem to feel it necessary to point out the offending noise to me. Emily LOVES people. She is constantly saying hi and bye (her favorite parting phrases are "adios!!" "Hasta Luego!!" and "See you LATER!!") She runs into strangers arms and gives hugs and kisses (as long as I say they are "ok people") My anti-social infant has evolved into a social butterfly and I love every minute of it.
So we go to my office today. Emily has been to my office a few times. She knows the ladies that I work with and is particularly fond of my boss. I was so proud of her today. There are a lot of things around the office that I know Emily is dying to get into. She eyed the candy dish on the receptionist's desk, ran over to a box of calculator tape, watched the photocopier spit out paper (at home she delivers anything the printer prints to Jeremy and me personally). Even though Emily wanted to get into all of these things, all I had to say was, "Emily that's a no no" and she would walk away without a fuss. She wouldn't even touch the object!! She ran into the lap of my boss and gave her a big hug. Emily talked to everyone and tried to have "adult" conversations with her serious face. I think she said something about her toy horse wearing a dog hat, but at least she was trying to be one of the girls :)
After our trip to the office Emily and I picked up some sandwiches on the way home and I tried to have "do lunch" with my lil office mate, but she had eaten so much junk at the office that she was no longer hungry. I put Emily down for a long nap and worked on some more paperwork.
I forgot to mention that last night Emily slept through the night with no problems. I guess the prior night of wakings was a fluke. I hope we get throught tonight with no problems.
The bad part of my day was when I got our Insurance Information Packet. Jeremy was laid off on April 30th so we applied for private insurance about a month ago. I called last week to find out the status of our application and was told that we would receive information in the mail. When I opened the packet all the paperwork noted that Jeremy was accepted and there were 2 insurance cards with just his name on it. I called to make sure that Emily and I were covered also. The representative that I talked to on the phone was really nice but told me that both Emily and I were denied for coverage. The reason being Emily's plagiocephaly (head flattening), torticollis and developmental delays. Mind you the woman on the phone could barely pronounce most of these conditions. The other reason was my "infertility issues". So basically the two most heartbreaking issues that I have been dealing with for the past two years are the reasons why my daughter and I have been denied health coverage. All I could do was cry.
This brought me to an issue that I haven't really thought too much about until now. Is it ok to cry in front of your children? Especially when it is just you and said child in the room together. There was no other adult around to make everything "OK". I'm sure that it is scary for a toddler to see their parent upset. Emily came over to me and patted my arm. I got it together and told her momma was fine. Even though it was nice to see empathy from Emily I didn't like the change that went over her. She seemed to be making an effort to be really low key and not rock the boat.
I'm not sure what we'll be doing about the lack of insurance. I need to take Emily back to the orthopedic surgeon soon. I guess we will have to use COBRA which will cost us $730 a month. It seems odd that when you are out of work the cost of continuing your insurance is so much.
Another thing that helped me laugh a little tonight was my reality tv. I am such a reality tv junkie. Tonight was the premiere of Joe Schmoe 2 and I LOVE IT!!! I wish Jeremy was here to laugh with me. I'm taping it so we can watch it together when he returns.
http://www.babiesonline.com/babies/j/jensem/
Jennifer
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