Elizabeth's Diary Entries Diary Navigation: Choose A Diary Entry -------------------- Latest Entry: 7/16/04 -------------------- 3/16/04 3/3/04 2/4/04 1/21/04 1/12/04 12/18/03 12/11/03 11/25/03 11/18/03 11/12/03 10/29/03 10/20/03 10/13/03 10/6/03 9/24/03 9/9/03 9/3/03 8/29/03 3/30/03 1/14/03 -------------------- Elizabeth's Introduction

January 12, 2004

Tomorrow Anna will be two years old. I still can't believe she's only going to be two. More like two going on 12.

Anna at two can get fully dressed and undressed, including winter boots and coat. She knows all 33 letters of the alphabet and can count objects up to 5. She likes Sesame Street and the Tweenies. She sleeps with a doll named Antosha who I made out of a towel. He's her "security object". She loves washing her hair and laughs when the soap gets in her eyes. She can do somersaults (!!), walk on her hands with dad holding her feet, can sled down a hill by herself, can climb a ladder and could probably snowboard if she had a chance. She can do an arabesque (ballet move where you stick one leg up in the air behind you, balancing on the other foot). She has an immense vocabulary. She knows only one word in English "ambulance". Her favourite toy is Lego. She likes most food, and favourites are meat (a girl after my own heart!), Danone "Rastishka" yogurt, blueberry pie, cranberry juice and cabbage soup made with chicken. Like her mum, she's not too excited about fruit. Anna sleeps an average of 12 hours a day, goes to bed between 8 - 8:30 and gets up between 6:30 - 7:30. She sleeps in a crib, but every morning we find her lying in bed next to Andrei. She copies everything Andrei does.

Two years ago Anna was born on January 13 after 39 weeks of a pregnancy where everything that could go wrong, did.

The beginning of pregnancy was marked by bleeding, not just spotting. I went to a high-risk clinic and began taking progesterone. The bleeding resumed at week 9 and I was on total bedrest. At week 15 I had an emergency appendectomy and spent a week in the hospital, where I saw more roaches than in a commercial for Raid. I had to shave myself for the operation with a straight-edged razor that had clearly been used by others before me. The doctors smoked in their rubber gloves (it was later explained that the rubber gloves were not sterile, since they were to protect the doctor from me, and not me from him). I was offered a termination and refused. We survived. At week 18 I had a fever of 105, and was transported by ambulance to the Municipal Hospital for Infectious Diseases, where I was diagnosed with dysentery. I stayed there for 2 weeks, and was treated with antibiotics "not recommended for use during pregnancy". I was offered a termination and refused. We survived. At week 32, I began having premature labour, was prescribed something to manage that. We survived. At 37 weeks, I had bronchitis and a double ear infection. We survived.

Since I had absolutely no signs of labour with Andrei (yes, really, I didn't know I was in labour until 2.5 hours before Andrei was born), and I was having constant signs of labour with Anna, I was really afraid I'd figure out what was going on too late. In the morning of January 13, I was pretty sure this was the real thing, and I was correct. I was 4 centimeters when we checked in and 2.45 hours later Anna was born. It was a beautiful birth, so much easier than the actual pregnancy. Just me, Dima and our doctor, the same one who'd delivered Andrei. No drugs, no episiotomy, and only about an hour or so of real pain. I pushed and Anna slid out. Lyubov Ilinichna (our OB) put her on my stomach, with her head right at my breast. Anna was so beautiful.

I couldn't breastfeed Anna. I did absolutely everything I could, the teas and the super-hospital-grade pump and the whole works, but I had no milk. My A-cup breasts yielded a few drops. I tried for two weeks and began formula feeding. I get so upset when I read things like "every woman can breastfeed, if she wants." That's about as true as saying "every woman can have natural childbirth, if she wants". I breastfed Andrei for 2.5 miserable months, when he was almost diagnosed with failure to thrive, and it turned out he was not getting anything from me. The first time I put a bottle in his mouth was the first time we'd ever been relaxed around each other. He took to the bottle immediately. Anna didn't. She loved to suck the breast, and she was not at all interested in the bottle. The first six months of feeding Anna were a nightmare, and then it began to get steadily better.

Anna didn't sleep through the night a single time until she was 18 months old. She would wake up screaming anywhere from 2 - 5 times a night. Even now, she will wake screaming once or twice a week. We're going to put her in her big-girl bed next week, but are afraid that she will take a really long time to calm down at bedtime. The crib, even though she can get out, is still good for physical restriction, which is something that Anna needs. We swaddled her at bedtime until she was 8 months. It was the only way she'd sleep.

Anna, I love you. I love your huge fluffy eyelashes, and your fuzzy hair, your soft fingers and the way you sleep with your arms bent at the elbow and hands beside your head, I love your laugh and your hugs and kisses and I love you.

Happy birthday to Anna, happy birthday to you!