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July 21, 2003
August 21, 2003
17 Months
Germaphobia
I was talking the other day with my cousin’s GF who happens to be an RN and she was telling me that a reasonable level of “dirt” on one’s body actually serves as a barrier against sickness, that a person needs a certain degree of “germs” in order to remain healthy. I am assuming this is based upon the theory that you build up a certain level of immunity to germs when you are exposed to them, and if you wash obsessively all the time, your body can never adjust. She gave me an example of how when homeless people live unbathed on the streets for months and months, they will often get sick immediately after showering for the first time in a shelter or hospital. All of this makes me think that it is no wonder Cameron, Charles and I are sick more than ever because we have to be the most “showered” people on the planet. Once again, all three of us have a terrible cough and cold and I am almost certain mine has developed into bronchitis. This past weekend while visiting my parents, Cameron actually had 4 baths in one day – but I really didn’t have a choice, honestly I didn’t. The first bath of the day was his usual bath, he is always bathed in the morning, not at night because in the morning he is very “crusty” from milk, drool, a bowel movement, etc., and I just prefer him to be bathed at that time, (especially in the summer, since he sweats so much at night despite the A/C). Then in the afternoon, we went to the pool and when we came back, he had to have a quick bath to get all the suntan lotion and chlorine off of him. The third bath occurred later that evening, right before bedtime after my cousin’s GF, trying to cool him off a bit, doused his head with stagnant, dirty pool water (from the back yard baby pool) that was filled with all this flotsam and debris from having sat out in the rain the night before. Cameron smelled almost fishy to me, so you know I couldn’t handle that – back into the bath he went. Finally, that night Cameron had an episode of vomiting (reflux related), that had him completely covered in vomit from head to toe. There was so much of it, it was even deep down in his ear canal. Well, naturally I had to bathe him again. Normally, I would only bathe him once a day so this was a rare occurrence. Still, I felt bad about it because that was simply ridiculous. I know I have a problem with my obsession with dirt and germs (avoiding them at all costs) and I don’t want to influence my child so that he turns out the same way (or has no immunity). I spend more money on Lysol wipes and disinfectant, not to mention Purell, which they say is really horrible (because it reduces your immunity to germs), so my short-term goal is to stop being such a germ freak. I must admit though, I am certain my toilet bowl is cleaner than most people’s kitchen floors, not that this is something to be proud of.
Hypochondria
I think I am either turning into a paranoid freak or just your garden variety hypochondriac, because I am nearly certain I have every terminal illness I can think of. If I read an article on breast cancer, I become certain that I feel painful lumps in my breasts. And speaking of breast cancer, I was reading an article about a man who was diagnosed with breast cancer. For the longest time, his doctors thought he was either having heart problems or anxiety attacks – turns out he has breast cancer. So, naturally with the chest pains I have been having, it is logical that I would start to worry that it is actually cancer I have and not anxiety attacks. I want to call my doctor and get checked out for it but I am afraid they will laugh in my face or get pissed off. Not that it matters what they think but even I realize I am being ridiculous.
Eat baby, eat
Despite his cold, Cameron has been proclaimed to be one of the healthiest, most thriving children his doctors have ever seen. I have to say, if you look at Cameron, you’d never know he doesn’t eat well, or suffers from severe reflux. He truly is the picture of health. I was actually sort of worried that he would suffer from eating (drinking) basically nothing but Pediasure but his gastroenterologist reassured us that Pediasure is actually a much more complete meal than solid foods. With each Pediasure drink, Cameron is getting a full serving of vegetables, protein, fat, etc. which he wouldn’t necessarily be getting if he were eating table food. Still, it would be better if he ate table food just for the texture and sensation of chewing and swallowing actual food. That is one aspect of this whole reflux issue that really bothers me (among other things). As a parent, as a MOTHER, I am missing out on something that sounds very superficial on its surface but in fact is very important - the pleasure and SATISFACTION we all get knowing, seeing, experiencing the nourishing of one's own child. There really is a certain pleasure that is derived from watching your child eat and grow and flourish and by only seeing Cameron drinking Pediasure, we don't get that relief or - satisfaction, if you will. Even though I know Pediasure is complete and healthy, I would feel a lot better seeing Cameron EAT REAL vegetables and see him ENJOY the taste of spaghetti or even the occasional cookie or whatever. I know that they all say food is for nourishing our bodies, not to please our soul but there is something completely therapeutic and comforting (obviously!) about eating a REAL meal and I hate that Cameron is missing out on that. He truly doesn't enjoy food at all and in a way, that is sad. Even though we shouldn't RELY on it, we all need a tasty, comforting meal from time to time and right now, Cameron is really missing out on that aspect of food. Especially now when he is a baby/child and can really afford to enjoy and eat whatever he wants without worrying about weight gain or cholesterol. I know there is plenty more time for that in his future so it's not the hopeless, desperate cause I am portraying here, but I am assuming you get what I mean.
His Health in General
Well, since I have touched upon the reflux issue, I suppose I should update on the latest goings-on with Cameron’s health in general. (For a complete history of his hearing loss and reflux please see my Babies Today Diary). I will start out first with the good news, that is, Cameron is healthy and fine, but a few weeks ago, we weren’t quite sure and we suffered quite a panic over a few doctors visits. But let me backtrack…
Hearing & BOR
I took Cameron to see his new ENT (ear, nose and throat doctor) a few weeks back and I was really excited about it because this doctor is supposed to be one of the best in region and he also is an expert on the ear pits that Cameron has. We wanted to see him regarding Cam’s hearing loss in general but also regarding what to do with his ear pits. The minute this doctor saw Cameron he asked whether Cameron has ever been tested for BOR, otherwise known as bronchial-oto-renal syndrome. I told him that that he had not and asked what this condition was. The doctor explained that BOR is a syndrome where a person (the majority of which are male), carry a gene that creates these ear pits, results in hearing loss, cysts in the throat and renal abnormalities. He also said (though I was hysterical at this point and not even listening), that people with this syndrome lead totally normally healthy lives (most of the time) and don’t even necessarily suffer life-altering affects, except maybe abnormal kidneys, chronic UTIs, and in worst case scenarios, increased hearing loss. I then asked the doctor what this meant exactly, such as, if Cameron DID have this syndrome, would he need a kidney transplant one day or what? I mean, you can’t just drop this sort of information on me without explaining exactly what we’re up against. The doctor reassured me that this was not at all the case, that I shouldn’t worry about anything of the sort and that he personally, felt that based upon Cam’s medical history, he seriously doubted Cameron even had this condition. Apparently, kids who have it suffer from poor health (until treated), horrible, painful kidney infections and things of this nature. However, he did feel that we should rule out the possibility of Cameron having this syndrome just to be on the safe side. He ordered a renal ultrasound as well as a urinalysis. On the way home from this visit I have to admit I was hysterical (mainly because I was alone since Charles had a meeting at work he simply could not miss and also had not anticipated receiving this sort of news) and felt like everything was coming to an end. I mean, it’s one thing to hear that your child has hearing loss, as upsetting as that can be, you know he won’t die or suffer physically from it. But the minute you start talking about major organs being affected, it starts to get scary, very quickly.
Without going into a long, drawn out description of the tests that followed, I will summarize by saying that he had the renal u/s which showed that Cam’s kidneys were perfectly normal and healthy – HUGE sigh of relief. His urinalysis (a real picnic – imagine scotch-taping a sandwich baggie to your groin area and trying to pee in it, then having it peeled off as the sticky tape rips at your skin) showed that Cameron has a urinary tract infection, which according to the ENT is very rare not only in a boy, but a boy of Cameron’s age. He said this result could mean several things – 1) the bag was tainted, 2) he has a UTI and it happens to be a fluke or 3) he may have a condition – (it just NEVER ends, does it) – called renal reflux, essentially where the ureters are too long for the child’s body and urine ends up spilling back into the kidneys. This condition is totally treatable if caught early. Eventually, the child outgrows the condition anyway, as his body grows, and is not all that serious if treated. So, we now have an appointment with a nephrologist to have certain tests performed to see whether or not Cameron has renal reflux, if this UTI is a fluke or if indeed there is something wrong with his kidneys (stemming from the BOR). Our ENT couldn’t speculate on this last possibility because he says kidneys are not his field but he said he’d be shocked if something were seriously wrong with Cameron because he is in no pain whatsoever and has no problem urinating or anything even remotely like that. So, we will see this specialist (the nephrologist), on September 8 and work toward solving yet another medical mystery. I did ask if there wasn’t just a simple blood test that could ultimately determine whether or not Cam does indeed have BOR and the doctor told me that the blood test for it is only done in medical research hospitals so they usually start with the renal u/s and urinalysis and go one from there. The doctor again reassured me that he doubted Cameron has this rare condition but it is important to know just in case.
You know, I hate to sound like a whiner, but the frustrating thing these days is that we go to a doctor for one thing and it always seems like we get sent to three others in completely different fields. It’s like from one condition stems another, and though none of them are all that serious or even the least bit debilitating, it is mentally draining. Cameron has recently developed an aversion to strange men (men he doesn’t know) and we know exactly why, because he sees so many doctors all of whom happen to be men and he is becoming so scared as he realizes all they do is poke and prod and upset him. It is really becoming disturbing.
Reflux
An example of this “branching out effect” as we like to call it, is Cameron’s visit with his gastroenterologist (who we see for his reflux). From that visit, Cam had to have an a modified barium swallow to determine how he swallows hard food, and he also had to have an endoscopy to determine what, if any damage he may have suffered from all these months of untreated/undiagnosed reflux. Both procedures were totally stressful and upsetting. With the barium swallow, Cameron threw up all over the room and all over everyone in the room. I could have told them he wouldn’t swallow a graham cracker with barium on it. No one believed me of course and tried it anyway and as expected, Cam screamed, cried and threw up. Then they tried a Cheerio, and that didn’t work either. Finally, they cut the Cheerio up into quarters, and that STILL wouldn’t go down. He just swallowed all the barium around it and let the Cheerio bit sit on the tip of his tongue until we took it out. The overall conclusion was that Cameron will have to take strong reflux medication and take his time learning to eat solids as his medication begins to work. He may also see an occupational therapist to help him learn to eat, depending on his progress. Again, I could have told them this information myself and spared Cameron the aggravation, but that is just life I guess.
Endoscopy
The endoscopy was yet another upsetting event for poor Cameron. BTW – for those of you who don’t know, an endoscopy is where they stick a camera down the esophagus and take pictures so they can see what is wrong. They also take a biopsy of the throat to determine other possible conditions.
Only one parent was allowed in the operating room (which it goes without saying was me) and that was only for as long as it took for him to fall asleep under the gas mask. Naturally, he wasn’t at all thrilled with being held down and having a mask shoved over his whole face, so he thrashed and screamed and then almost immediately fell limp, like a tiny little frog, just lying there. It was quite pitiful to watch and even more dreadful to observe. I cried the whole way out the door, it was just too much.
After about 45 minutes, our gastroenterologist came out and sat down between Charles and I in the waiting area. He had pictures of Cameron’s throat that honestly, looked quite ominous. His throat/esophagus appeared to be all ridged and bumpy and really strange looking. Granted, I am no doctor and I am certainly not a gastroenterologist, but even I could see that it didn’t look right. As he looks at the pictures, the doctor says “Well, it seems that something is up…” Naturally, when phrased like that, Charles and I immediately start to fall apart and all we can think of is CANCER. We always assume the worst, of course. As we start to lose it, the doctor quickly reassures us that everything is fine and there is nothing seriously wrong, he only meant to convey the fact that Cameron definitely had something going on in his system that appeared to be either severe reflux or something along that level, but nothing worth getting upset over. We breathed a huge sigh of relief but later commented to one another that this guy could certainly take a lesson or two in doctor-patient communication skills.
The doctor also said that they needed to rule out the possibility of what looked like might be (though he doubted it) a food allergy to either wheat, gluten, casein or milk and if he did indeed have such an allergy, Cameron would need to see an allergist. This is what I was talking about before – we go in for reflux treatment only to be sent to yet ANOTHER specialist. Nevertheless, a few days after the endoscopy, we received a call from the gastroenterologist who informed us that based on the official test results, Cameron does not have a food allergy at all, he simply has duodenitis and gastritis, which is a fancy way of saying he has irritation in his throat from all the untreated reflux. This also came as a big relief because though a food allergy is not a big deal, I would prefer for Cameron not to have to deal with that if he doesn’t have to. The “simple” treatment means that probably for the next 3 years, Cameron will no longer be taking Zantac, but instead will take Prilosec every morning to combat all the acid in his system and allow him to finally eat normally.
So far, the Prilosec seems to be really working – Cameron has started eating baby food again (which is progress in our case) and yesterday, even ate some shredded cheese which he NEVER would have done before. So, we feel confident that all this too shall pass in its due time. We are simply thankful that even though these little issues seem to crop up more often than we’d like, they are nothing serious and nothing permanent. Hopefully, the visit with the nephrologist will prove the same.
Rash
I have one final “ailment” to speak of and that is a rash that Cameron had on his wrists and elbows. The rash looked exactly like poison ivy, these little pustule type things, gathered together in little clumps. We took Cam to the doctor and after answering all the standard questions like if he had eaten anything different than his usual diet or if he was on any new medication, the doctor told us that it wasn’t eczema and it wasn’t chicken pox but it was probably a reaction to something he had touched. He said that with children, they often get these mysterious rashes that are difficult to diagnose and that we shouldn’t be too worried since Cameron didn’t even seem to notice he had a rash. He prescribed an ointment and told us that Cameron had probably come across some thistle that had pricked him and that he had had an allergic reaction to that. Where Cameron would come across thistle is beyond me because I know we don’t have any in our back yard and I certainly never let him run around unattended anywhere, especially not in woodsy areas. The rash went away but you can still see remnants of it and sometimes, it even looks like it is coming back. It is only on his had and elbow, nowhere else on his body. It is starting to irritate me that we really don’t know what this is – anyone have any ideas? I plan to ask the pediatrician for a referral to a pediatric dermatologist if it doesn’t clear up completely and very soon. Might as well add yet another specialist to Cameron’s list, right? Haha.
What a little brute…
Ok, enough of all the boring medical talk, I need some sound advice on what to do regarding a recent “problem” we have been having with Cameron. He has taken to hitting (mainly me) when he doesn’t get his way or is frustrated/tired. For example, when he is tired and needs his diaper changed, he will sometimes get upset and just smack me on my arm and once he even did it across my face. Or if he wants to play with something he shouldn’t and we tell him not to touch it or we remove him from the situation, he will get mad and hit or at least try to. I know, I know – you are probably saying – so what? All kids do it at some point – deal with it and move on. And I know this but it still bothers me because I don’t know where he would have picked such a thing up. We don’t hit him and we certainly don’t hit each other. I mean, HOW does a child come to the conclusion that hitting will get him what he wants? Or is this some innate response that is beyond his control? I notice a lot of his little friends doing this too and no one really seems to have any answers. I would never hit Cameron, especially since at this age I think it just reinforces the negative behavior we are trying to correct. I don’t want to constantly yell the word “No!” at him, because I think it will start to lose its meaning. The one thing that seems to work is when I make a very stern face and move him to a corner of the room and tell him to stay there until he can be nice. This is very hard to do because sometimes when he hits, he laughs and gets this smirk on his face and it is really hard not to burst out laughing because he looks so funny. When I do succeed at looking stern, he really does seem to respond to that type of discipline and afterwards will often come over to me sheepishly, put his head on my shoulder and give me a big hug as if to say he is sorry. This method seems to be working so far but I was interested in knowing if anyone had any advice they could give me that would be better than what we are doing. I also want to try to curb this behavior before it starts to get out of hand. He has pretty much stopped doing it but every so often, will revert back and I really would just like to stop it altogether – or am I being unrealistic?
New Words
I have been trying to work with Cameron on his words. He has a few of those “My First Words” type of books with the object on one page with the name of the object underneath, and he really likes looking at these books. But then I bought these great flashcards at Wal-mart which contain all the letters of the alphabet with an object for each letter represented on the other side of the card. Cameron just LOVES these cards, it is like he is obsessed with them. He likes cards of any kind, playing cards, credit cards, index cards – any type of card that he can hold in those grubby little paws of his. (smile) So I just figured he’d love having flash cards and learning from them and I certainly was right. As soon as I got home, I opened them up and we started down the list – A for apple, B for bear, etc. Well, for whatever reason Cameron just loves the “A for apple” card and goes around the house saying “ap-ool” and holding his little card in his hand. When we were at a friend’s house yesterday, she had flash cards all over the floor, nearly the same ones as we have. There were about a dozen and sure enough one of them was an “A for apple” card. Cameron went over to the group of cards and immediately picked out the apple card and started running around saying “ap-ool” - that was a very big deal for me.
We have also taught him to say “Mmmm mmmm” after he tastes anything, whether it’s his medicine or water or his bottle or even licking a piece of solid food. As son as he swallows, we say “Mmmm Mmmm good!!!!” It’s pretty funny because sometimes he hates the way his medicine tastes and he will fight us on it, but after he swallows it, he’ll still say “Mmmm mmmm” with a big grin on his face. Recently he has started saying “Mmmm Mmmm - goo!” as in “good” – but he drops the last consonant, something he does with almost all his words. Anyway, it was still really cute, and even though to most people his “words” are not all that advanced or impressive, we are thrilled any time he says anything because it signifies to us that he is developing normally, which is all we ever really wanted.
Little Francophone
And speaking of words, recently my Aunt Madeleine was visiting from Switzerland. She only speaks French (as do all of my mother’s relatives) and when she spoke to Cameron, she would always speak to him in French. So, one day when she said “Bonjour Cameron!” Cameron then immediately turned to her and said “Bon – jeh!” It honestly really sounded close to the actual word and not like a baby word – I wonder if the French language is easier to learn for babies than English (because the consonants are often dropped)? Anyway, I was so happy to hear him say something in French – too cute.
Hey Parents – Please Get a Life!!!
I was watching a documentary the other night on the subject of young girls in gymnastics. The whole issue was whether or not these girls are being pushed too hard at a very young age to compete to become Elite gymnasts, apparently the best sort of gymnast there is to be. I happen to love gymnastics myself, not that I was ever any good at it, but I do love to watch. So I settled in and proceeded to watch what turned out to be a very disturbing revelation regarding (some) parents today.
The show interviewed different families and their daughters (the gymnasts), as well as coaches and trainers regarding the life in general of an Elite gymnast, the hard work, the dedication, the sacrifice, the talent. One family featured had a seven –year old daughter who was training to eventually become an Elite gymnast. Apparently during her training, this little girl had started limping and it was soon discovered that she had a fractured ankle. Her parents explained to the audience, that they told their daughter (Ashley) that if she wanted to be a real professional she would have to stop crying and just “suck it up” because that is what real gymnasts do. I wanted to just scream at these people – are you high? It’s a BROKEN ANKLE, not a hangnail for God’s sake! Ashley ended up competing in her scheduled events, not winning, and worst of all, broke her other ankle. Her parents admitted to perhaps wanting “this” more than their daughter did and were not really sure if they were just pressuring her because it was they who really wanted her to win. This is exactly the problem I am talking about. These crazy, obsessive parents who just want their kids to be number one, no matter what the price.
The rest of the segment focused on these same sorts of stories, little girls (as well as their families) who gave up everything and anything for the sake of that 1 in a million chance to become an Olympian. A lot of them suffered disappointment, some achieved the fame and glory they sought but every one of them gave up their entire childhood.
Now, forgive me, for I am not familiar with this sort of lifestyle – I have never competed in sports, have never had a goal of going to the Olympics and have not even (yet) been the parent of child who has committed themselves to a particular sport, so maybe I have a few things to learn. But it seems to me that there is something horribly wrong with teaching your child that you have sacrifice health for fame and fortune. I am not saying that if Cameron wants to play a sport professionally one day that I won’t support him. Of course I will. But I will never tell him to play on his broken ankle. Or to suck up the pain. I guess that makes me a lousy parent, but so be it.
I think it’s wonderful to be a professional athlete. And I admire and respect these young kids who can somehow muster up the self-discipline required to train and compete successfully. And don’t think for a minute that I wouldn’t love it if Cameron became a great athlete. I’d love it and I’d be the first one out there screaming “That’s my son! That’s my son!” But I would try my best not to do is put my wishes and desires first, before Cameron’s own happiness. And I would never in a million years tell him to compete with a serious injury. Maybe that means that I am going to make him “soft” and maybe that means he won’t get an Olympic medal one day but I honestly don’t care as long as he is happy.
Warmly,
Corinne and Cameron
Born 3-15-02
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