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October 11, 2002
Friday, October 11, 2002
Approaching 6 Weeks (I think!)
So far, so good! Thus far I’m feeling fine and enjoying life. I continue to have some lower abdominal cramping, but it isn’t nearly as bad as I remember it being last time. I think every symptom I had last time was inflated… I was super sensitive to everything, not only because I had never experienced it, but also because I was paranoid that the baby wasn’t okay… that he was growing wrong or that he wouldn’t live. I really am more relaxed this time.
That insatiable pregnancy hunger has hit big time! WOW. I had forgotten just how painful that hunger is. When those hunger pangs hit, they hit hard. It’s a hunger like no other and it feels as though I haven’t eaten in days (not that I actually know what that feels like!) It’s a strange sensation because as sickeningly hungry as I am, the feeling is cured with just a few bites of food… it doesn’t take a nine-course meal to make me feel better. I am going to have to remember to start keeping Cheerios and crackers by my bed. That feeling hit at midnight last night and I ignored it… probably not the wisest of choices, but I was just plain too lazy to get out of bed and do anything about it. By the time I awoke this morning, it was pretty bad. Mike brought a piece of bread and a banana to me in bed and it instantly made me feel better!
Fatigue! Oh yes, it has hit. I do feel lucky that this time around, I am home all week and I never work two or more days in a row. I have been sleeping when Ethan sleeps and that has helped my energy level tremendously. I am going to enjoy sleep while I can! As I recall, sleep became very, very challenging in the later months of pregnancy! Not only does it get challenging at the end, but then you just plain go without it for months after the baby comes. Amazing how nature prepares you for such things. I am constantly amazed at the number of hours of sleep I can get by on now. Before I had a baby, I would have told anyone who asked that I needed 9-10 hours to function… if I get six, uninterrupted hours of sleep now, I’m in heaven and I have the energy of a pink bunny banging on a drum!
I went back and read my diary for when I got pregnant with Ethan. I wanted to see when different things started happening in my body. So far, things are happening in about the same time frame, but I would say they are much milder in severity. That is the good part… milder in severity! The bad part… well, if I calculated correctly, the morning sickness didn’t really hit until about 7 weeks. Since I am now approaching about 6 weeks, time will tell just how much my life will be altered. I am still hoping that it passes me by. I have had no nausea at all in the past two days… lucky? I hope so.
I have absolutely VIVID memories of being sick with Ethan. If you have a weak stomach, feel free to skip this next paragraph…
I remember holding on to that porcelain bowl for dear life. I remember heaving and heaving and heaving. I remember one day I was absolutely craving pancakes… so Mike got up and made me some and they were so delicious… and I remember that about an hour later, I threw them all up. I remember one morning I tried to take Tylenol on an empty stomach and to this day I regret doing it… I vomited for close to a half hour… and because it was first thing in the morning, there was nothing in my stomach… so it was all bile coming up… and the taste of it made me so sick that I’d vomit some more… and so it was a never ending cycle. I remember that the tears were running down my face and I was shaking and weak and my stomach muscles just would not calm down and I was praying in a soft whisper, “Please God, please, please, please, please, just make it stop. Make it go away. Please. I can’t vomit anymore. Please.” I doubt I’ll ever forget that.
I remember when I was about sixteen weeks pregnant (I think) and we went to Red Robin for dinner. I had this Santa Fe-something-er-other and some steak fries… oh it tasted so good. We got in the car to go home (only about 4 miles away) and half way there I remember looking at Mike and saying, “Oh no. I just don’t feel good.” I started to cry because it hurt so bad… funny because one thing I remember so vividly is that he looked at me and said, “And THIS, this right here is why we are NEVER, EVER having another baby, do you hear me?” Hahaha. Joke’s on us I guess. Anyway, we pulled into the garage just in time. Mike knew what was going on… I bolted out of the car and into the house to the bathroom and for a split second, didn’t know if I should SIT on the toilet or KNEEL in front of it. I opted to sit. No sooner did I sit, with part of my meal coming out that end, than the nausea had reached its peak and I just started throwing up. I had nothing so I held out my shirt and threw up into my shirt. My husband, bless his heart… (okay, I’m crying as I type this)… he came into the bathroom and grabbed the garbage can (because my shirt wouldn’t hold anymore) and held it for me as I sat on the toilet. I was sobbing and retching and shaking and he stood there and held my hair back with one hand and held the garbage can in the other. The bathroom smelled BAD… and my husband has a weak stomach for that sort of thing… and I KNOW it was getting to him… but he stayed. When I was done, he proceeded to clean everything up for me… he cleaned out the garbage can and then cleaned up the floor as I sat there, still sicker than a dog. He then undressed me as I sat there and went and rinsed out my shirt and put on a load of laundry and then drew me up a bath. DID I MARRY THE GREATEST GUY OR WHAT?
Okay… not sure why I felt the need to relive my sickest moments of pregnancy, but I did. So there.
So a lot of people have been asking me that all important question… “VBAC or no VBAC?” That is the question.
I think I’ve decided that I REALLY want to go for a VBAC. I have done a lot of reading on the subject. Thank you to Jeanette for leaving some WONDERFUL articles on my TTM board… I have not read them yet, but fear not! I thought maybe I’d try to find a midwife this time around… if not to deliver the baby, at least to get some advice from. I do live in Western Washington… the midwife-doula-natural childbirth-Mecca of the world! Well, just my dumb luck… I can’t get a midwife out there to even give me the time of day because I’ve had a c-section and most of them don’t do VBAC’s. Oh well. If I must stick with an OB, I’m totally okay with that. I LOVE my doctor, but I will be more informed this time and I will make sure I have his support to do this. I am really set on doing this. I WILL be writing more about this in future entries!
I guess I should end here for now. I must go and get myself prepared to work a 12-hour shift tonight… how fun! I told a couple of people from work that there is a new baby… I didn’t tell them it was a secret or anything. I haven’t been to work since Sunday night, so it’ll be interesting to see if anyone says anything when I get there. I must say, it does make going to work exciting.
Wish me luck that the morning-sickness fairy decides to leave me alone… after all, didn’t she sprinkle enough dust on me last time to make up for this time? I mean, really.
Tootles…
~~Christina & the Jellybean
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