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Ten things, and three things
June 15, 2006
Ten things I hate about being pregnant
1. Heartburn. Ug. I can't eat anything without that familiar burning in the back of my throat within an hour. The burning that lets me know I better not try lying down (one of my favorite positions these days) without finding some sort of pill to take first. Anything sets me off.
2. Needing to pee every hour on the hour. My god! It's like I've just finished peeing and I already need to go again. If I try to ignore the sensation or just—gasp!—wait for a commercial or my conversation to reach a pause, then I am in pain within minutes. Literal pulling on my stomach, muscles clenching in my bladder pain. And hauling oneself on and off a toilet is not the easiest proposition these days, let alone the non-ease of being able to assure myself clean (tmi?).
3. Inability to sleep through the night. This is largely related to #2. My night is a series of gradually waking up only to realize that, yes, I have to pee again. Desperately I try to ignore it and fall back asleep but this is rarely an option and the process of hauling my big self up and stumbling through our dark house is never an easy one. Often, however, just the complicated process of turning over can be prohibitive to doing so lightly while sleeping. To this end, I have taken to largely sleeping downstairs on the couch rather then worry about waking up Jamie over and over, not to mention that I'm also in the bad habit of relying on old TV shows to quickly lull me back to sleep.
4. Strangers comments/hands. Grrrrr... What is it about a pregnant lady that makes her life and her body public property? I KNOW these people have the kindest intentions but am still aghast at how comfortable complete strangers feel prying into these intimate details of my life—how far along? Boy or girl? What will you call her? Your first? And these are the harmless comments. Then there are those who think either think they are funny or seem to have never seen a pregnant woman before. I am getting big but I know I am more or less right on track for size yet have had such lovely comments as "Two more months?!!? Wow!" "Sure you don't have twins in there!?" "You look ready to pop" . Even these comments, however, aren't what really gets me... that, my friends, would be the hands. People touching me!! Touching my stomach. I hate it. Hate hate hate it and despite my looks of death people can't seem to keep their grimy paws off my body. Yuck!!!!
5. Can't drink. Actually, it's not that I can't drink, because if you read the fine print of just about every baby book most will concede that, well, actually you can have a very occasional drink or two but just don't get carried away. So truthfully, sometimes I will share a beer with Jamie or have some wine with dinner. But certainly never in mixed company. It's just not worth it. As much as I try to assure them that I am not instantly giving my girl a case of fetal alcohol syndrome their looks tell me that they are trying to figure out how to get such a horrible mother as myself locked up ASAP.
6. Getting Fat. Sorry, but what can I say? I'm a product of our society and have been raised in a world that is obsessive about weight. As much a pregnancy is amazing, the fact that it involves such girth expansion is not a joy to me. Not to mention that I have heard over and over how much harder it is to lose the weight after #2 and as you get older and losing weight has never been my strong point to begin with.
7. Inability to do my job. I have to say my coworkers have been great about not giving me assignments with very heavy (physically) patients but still, an awful lot of what I do includes moving around fairly quickly, reaching for things in odd, awkward locations, stretching, boosting, lifting, and shifting people. Even though, as stated, people have been very good about trying not to let me hurt myself I HATE not being able to do my job as well as I could, not to mention needing to add to everyone else's already busy day when they need to stop and do something for me. It's horrible. With Ella I worked right up until my due date but this time I am stopping a month early because it really is quite taxing.
8. Threat of varicose veins. Ewww! Especially when you have a job that requires you to be on your feet all day. My co-worker was kind enough to show me hers and not only are they nasty but they never go away. I have been wearing teds stockings while I work. Hopefully they will prevent me from doing my veins any long term damage but they are so tight, they are impossible to get on and even harder at the end of the day when I am exhausted. Plus they are SO HOT I break a sweat just moving around on the job.
9. Stretch marks. Here, the damage has already been done and again I know (esp. from experience with my first) that these babies aren't going anywhere. Maybe some consider them badges of honor but I consider them weird and not attractive and I know there is basically nothing I can do about it. Except, of course, b*tch to you all....
10. Okay, maybe there is only nine things I hate. There are others I'm sure but I think I will stop here...
Three things I love about being pregnant:
1. I know I have it good. I know there are people out there that have tried harder and longer then I without the longed for positive and I also know that I am blessed to have avoided so many potential complications—bedrest, sciatica, extreme morning sickness, gestational diabetes—until this point (knocking on wood as I write this).
2. It's a miracle. I truly believe this and, not being a very religious person, I remember feeling during my first pregnancy that this was one of the first times I was completely convinced that there is a 'bigger force' out there helping us out. Because the idea of making life where there was not just blows my mind every time I try to wrap myself around it. So seriously? Being able to be the vehicle for the most amazing process I have ever come across makes me feel like a miracle worker.
3. Growing my family. I want this girl, this daughter so much. I can't wait to meet her, I can't wait to see Ella as a sister. I would go through this and ten times worse for the final product. I ache to hold this girl and am so excited to know that we are so far on our way to being a family of four.
Thanks for reading,
Bonnie
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