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June 17, 2004
Thursday 17 June 2004
It’s winter in Australia
Ryan is almost 31 months old – check him out: www.babiesonline.com/babies/r/rg
This entry is a little disjointed, starting late last week – sorry!
FRIDAY 11th JUNE
The Weekend Beckons
This evening at 5.00pm (4.45pm if I’m lucky and the boss leaves before me) is the beginning of a long weekend. Yippee for the Queen’s Birthday. Why we Australians still ‘celebrate’ the Queen of England’s birthday is beyond me and I bet it’s not even her real birthday. But that’s fine, I can handle an extra day off work. Our long weekend is not looking overly exciting (quiet Friday night at home, Saturday morning appointment at the vet for poor kitty who is 12, quite neurotic and losing weight for some unknown scary reason) but DH & I are going to see a Queen tribute band on Saturday night. I won tickets in a radio competition – I might have mentioned my obsession with winning things in radio competitions (while I’m at work of course; the office phone has a hotline to the station I’m sure - it never fails me).
I am looking forward to just being at home for the next 3 days and letting this little boy of mine sleep later in the mornings. He just HATES getting out of his bed lately. I know I should be grateful for having such a great sleeper and I am - it’s just that when we’re all running late and need to be at the day carer’s house by 7.45am in order for me to get to work on time, it’s tricky when Ryan won’t open his eyes, keeps rolling away from me and telling me ‘sleep! sleep!’ It doesn’t help that it is now winter and quite dark outside at 7.00am when I first rouse him.
TUESDAY 15th JUNE
Back at work after our 3 days off. It was lovely to spend time with Ryan, as always. At 2 ½ he’s still taking a 2 hour nap after lunch which is great – it gives me time to do some laundry, tidy up and grab a bite to eat. Our laundry is downstairs so it’s a chore I can’t do easily when Ryan is up and racing around. DH is of the opinion that Ryan probably doesn’t need a nap anymore but the very fact that he IS napping for at least 2 hours throws that theory out of the window. Sleep time is growing time and Ryan is a much happier boy when he’s had his nap. DH & I often disagree on what’s right for Ryan; he tends to tell me how his ex-wife used to handle things with their child (insert an angry looking face with steam coming out of its ears about now).
I thought about giving this post the title ‘The Entry I Shouldn’t Be Writing’ and then rambling on about how much DH & I disagree these days. I just feel completely wrung out and largely unsupported. I work an 8 hour day Monday – Friday and come home each evening at 5.30pm for my next shift. I’m lucky to sit down before 10pm. DH would not have a clue what to prepare for Ryan’s lunch for the following day, what is kept in his day care bag, when his check-ups are due, how much or when to pay our day carer. He is a great daddy to Ryan, loves him to bits and plays with him lots but he just doesn’t get that involved in the day-to-day tasks that must be done (the messy stuff, the boring stuff, the routine stuff).
Am I alone in thinking that 99.9% of childcare and housework is generally done by the female, even when she works full time outside of the home? I truly believe that if I didn’t do it, the bathrooms, toilets, vacuuming, dusting, washing, ironing, wiping and cleaning would NEVER be done or only when they absolutely HAD to be done (and we know that’s not often enough, don’t we ladies?) Like a lot of men, DH seems to think that his domain is the yard and garden, the car and the downstairs garage/workshop area – and it’s not as if those areas are dazzling and well organised.
Tomorrow (as always) I will be the one getting up half an hour before everyone else to get myself ready before waking Ryan and getting him ready for the day, while DH sleeps in a little later, then looks after only himself. It feels like a battle I can’t win – if I say something, if I ask for more help, then I’m ‘nagging’. If swearing was permitted in these diaries, this is where I would be letting loose. I think I need a blog!
Sorry – I’m having a bad day. It’s my pity party. Seriously, I would love to know how you divide household/childcare chores, particularly where both parents work full time outside of the home. Sometimes I fear I will do the praying mantis thing and rip his head off!
MY SWEET BOY
My little veggie-hater has developed a liking for raw carrot so I am encouraging that and offering a bowl of small carrot pieces often! He won’t eat much in the way of cooked veggies unless they are well camouflaged. When asked what he would like for dinner he says ‘potatoes and meat please!’ - he definitely has a lot of English/Irish blood in him. I hope his palate will become a little more adventurous one day. Of course he very rarely gets a CHOICE of what to have for dinner; he eats whatever we are having but some meals are more of a success than others.
I’m finding I need to buy size FOUR clothes for Ryan now as the threes are getting too short (he is a TALL boy – over half my height (170cm) already!) I can hardly believe it. I so miss shopping in the baby and toddler sections of shops and buying ‘cute’ little clothes. Everything in 3's and upwards seems to be covered in trucks, motorcycles, numbers and logos which I can’t stand. I also hate that I can’t buy him all-in-one singlets anymore (singlets? vests? what do you call them in the U.S/Canada? Those sleeveless little numbers that go under their clothes). They are so cosy and warm and don’t ‘untuck’ from his jeans, leaving an expanse of bare chilly skin!
Potty training - Ryan is still in his Huggies day and night. He will sit happily on the potty chair for quite a while, reading a book or ‘chatting’ to me, with no results. I feel like I will be buying Huggies forever! I had hoped to get him well on the way to potty training at home before taking his potty chair to day-care but I think the best way might be to do it in reverse. He seems to eat better, sleep better and hopefully pee better at his day care – it’s peer group pressure in its earliest stages, I’m sure! Worth a try anyway. Ryan just doesn’t seem to mind walking around in a wet or dirty nappy – the Huggies are too efficient! (There’s my plug, Huggies – when can I expect my free nappies?)
A HEARTBREAKING DAY AT WORK
I work for the State Forensic Pathologist and up until recently I have largely been able to ‘switch off’ when I go home at night. I love my work, it is interesting and I really feel we are making a difference. It goes without saying that I am exposed to all sorts of sad and tragic stories and I have been able to step back from them and just do my work. I could not do that this week. This particular case disturbed me so much that I found myself in tears on the way to my car after work and I just could not stop thinking about it. A 4 year old boy went with his father this past weekend into the ‘bush’ (forest?) to chop wood. He wandered off and his father searched for an hour, then alerted the authorities who continued searching. Now, it is winter here, very cold at night and we have had a lot of heavy rain. They eventually found this little fellow’s body in a nearby river the next day. I cannot stand to think about that little boy lost overnight, alone, cold and frightened. It breaks my heart to even write about it now. My heart goes out to his parents. I truly do not think I could cope if I was that boy’s mother.
Cases like this make me feel like quitting work and never letting Ryan out of my sight again. But I realise this is totally irrational. Of course, there are times when we can’t be with our children. Please just make sure they are safe and supervised at all times. I snuggled up with my sweet little boy last night, breathing in his lovely smell and touching his soft skin and thanked God that I have him, safe and sound.
What a downer this entry has been. I’m just in that kind of place right now. The fact that it’s winter plus I’m hormonal doesn’t help much! I think PMT affects me more since having Ryan than it ever did before or maybe I’m just a whole lot more exhausted – yeah, that sounds about right!
What sort of ‘summery’ things have you been doing? Drag me out of this wintery mood by telling me all about the sun, the sand, the beach and long evenings spent outside. How I miss that. It will come around soon enough, I know, but for now I’d love to hear about what you are doing on those long summer days.
Until next time
Sue & Ryan
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