quick clicks

moms today articles

moms today q&a

community & groups

research baby names

prepare a birth plan

content channels

ip channel rss feeds

read birth stories

read parenting stories

recommended books

e-newsletters

safety recalls

ip diaries

ip store

mom of the month

dad of the month

editor's letter

letters to the editor

Single By Choice

Choosing Single Motherhood

By Virginia Gilbert

Once thought to be a shameful result of impulsive behavior, single motherhood is now becoming an "option for privileged, unmarried women," says Jane Bock, Assistant Professor in the Department of Human Development at the University of Wisconsin in Green Bay. An expert on Single Mothers By Choice (SMC), Dr. Bock reports that between 1980 and 1990 the birth rate increased 12 percent for professional white women ages 30-34, a staggering 78 percent for women ages 35-39, and 38 percent for 40- to 44-year-olds.

Bock followed the lives of 26 single mothers by choice in southern California for several years. She found that the "typical" SMC was older than 35, well-educated, professionally successful and financially responsible. In short, these women had "a lot to bring to the motherhood relationship" but were tired of waiting for Prince Charming to show up. While still hoping for a future committed relationship, they decided to proceed with the decision to have a baby before their childbearing years ran out. Bock got to observe the children from these single-mom households and describes them as being "awesome."

"These kids are smart, verbal and secure," raves Bock. "I've never seen kids behave so well. When you're in a home where you're loved and wanted and planned for that much, well, how blessed are you?"

Patrick Fagan, a Fellow in Family and Culture at the Heritage Foundation, a conservative think tank in Washington, D.C., believes these children are more cursed than blessed. Fagan worries that the rise of single parenthood is eroding the traditional family in this country. He states that "the children of single mothers fare worse [than those from two-parent households] by far." Specifically, Fagan cites data that these offspring are 6.6 times more likely to live in poverty; 22 times more likely to be incarcerated, and to possess lower verbal skills, educational achievement and professional attainment. In addition, Fagan says that these kids will grow up to have higher rates of both out-of-wedlock births and divorce.

Want to see more?

• Part II

Found 2 comments
Displaying all 2 comments below