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That First Wonderful Year

Relax and Enjoy Baby's First Year of Life

By Shannon McKelden

"Something that surprised me about my kids' first years of life was how strong and independent they can be when you give them some space to explore," Estes says. "I learned this lesson more with my second than my first because I was a bit overprotective the first time around. The second born is much more adventurous and physically able to do more than his big brother at that age because I haven't hovered so much. I've let him climb up the playground equipment without helping him just so we both could see if he could do it, and he's surprised me more than once."

Pantley shared this experience. She worried about who was walking and talking and if they were "normal," even comparing them with other children. "By the time our fourth baby joined our family, I no longer worried about when he would roll over, crawl, walk or talk," she says. "I was able to relax and enjoy each step along the way, knowing that some children move quickly ahead in some areas, but take their time catching up in others."

"Parenting is really the hardest job in the world," says Dr. Zukow, also coauthor of the book BABY: An Owner's Manual (Beaufort Books, 2007). "You've taken on a full-time, 24/7 job ... the hours are long, you never get enough vacation time, and the pay is lousy. The older the kids get, the poorer the pay and the harder the job becomes."

But "at the end of the first year, the biggest surprise is that no matter how many nights you go to bed feeling exhausted and completely unqualified as a parent, you've probably done a pretty good job after all," Dr. Zukow says.

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