Women and Work

Still Frazzled After All These Years?

By Kelly Burgess

Sue Dickenson loves her job. She also loves her two children. Currently at home on maternity leave with her second one, she's not really looking forward to having to deal with her insensitive boss when she returns to work. Although she's entitled to paid time off for any reason she chooses – or no reason at all – her boss feels he's due an explanation when she does need to take off. When it's child-related, such as doctor's visits or a school event, he reacts as if that's not a valid reason.

"It frustrates me that he can't believe I would take time off for what he sees as these trivial things, and I think the reason he doesn't understand is because his wife is a stay-at-home mom," says Dickenson. "He doesn't need to worry about things like that because he has someone else taking care of it for him. I don't have someone else to take care of it for me."

Dickenson's experiences led her to create UnlimitedMom.com to provide support to other women in her situation, but she still feels frustrated at how insurmountable this problem seems to be. Not only, she points out, are men simply not as involved in child care issues, but women often have little sympathy for each other's choices.

"One of the biggest stresses for me is that it seems like women are at war in a way that fathers are not," says Dickenson. "Women who choose to work get some of their most severe criticism from other women. Men don't get that from any quarter."

Want to see more?

• The Career Challenge: How Moms Balance Work, Family and External Pressure
• CEO of Everything: Balancing Career and Family
• Moms At Work: Is Returning to Work Right for You?
• Talk about it!